One Year in Massachusetts

One Year in Massachusetts

We are "celebrating" our first anniversary for our move to Massachusetts. One year ago this week-end, we closed on and moved into our house. Some things are much better now, some things are much worse. Maybe we'll do a little top 10 for the good and the bad...

Top 10 great things about our move and the last year (in no particular order):

1- David got his first "REAL" job and Michelle quit all her real jobs.
2- we bought a house that is big enough to raise a small family
3- we bought a very cute house that needed little work done to it and which we love calling home
4- we live in the country and love our surroundings and neighbors
5- we met Rita McConnon and Michelle now has her dream job and a new best friend
6- Michelle got pregnant with our second child (owing to the fact she was able to quit working full time and we have real health insurance again) which will mean a baby sister for Grace this spring
7- we are able to skip some of those pesky family functions that we really didn't want to go to without making up a fake excuse
8- we have made tons of new friends and have learned to rely on them in times of crisis
9- David has seen the Boston Red Sox play at Fenway park
10-Massachusetts is a hotbed for cycling activity and David is in heaven

Top 10 worst things about our move (aka what we miss about living in Utah)
1- the humidity here stinks
2- the bugs, in-particular the ticks and mosquitos, are horrible here
3- the dogs require much more maintenance and are much more expensive to care for here
4- we live much too far away from our family and miss them terribly and worry constantly that our kids will not have close relationships with their grandparents at such a distance
5- we have to think up something for dinner for 7 nights a week because we can't go to dinner at the Chapman's or the Mitchell's anymore (and still can't afford to eat out much)
6- driving and shopping here are a real chore
7- there are no mountains here and way too many trees
8- we spend a lot at the post office (and so does everyone we left in Utah)
9- we spend a lot of money on plane tickets to "exotic" places, like Utah
10-curb and gutter-what's that???

At the very least, we are grateful to be much better off at this time this year than at this time last year. We aren't finishing mountains of paper-work to buy a house, we aren't in the middle making big life-changing decisions, we aren't living with our parents anymore, we finally have everything put away from the move (at least everything important) and have finished furnishing the house and making it our own, we aren't wondering how it is all going to work out and wondering if we made the right decision. Now, even though it is sometimes hard, we know we made the right move and we know we've been extremely blessed this past year. We finally have a little bit of security to our lives and can enjoy what we have without so much worry about what is going to happen next year. Of course, every time you say something like that, you are given something to worry about, so scratch that last part...

Livin' in the country...

For as much complaining as I do about having to drive so far to shop for this or that, I really do love living in the "country." We really do live in a pretty rural setting. We live at the corner of 2 dirt roads across the street from a big river. We pass huge farms of all types whenever we drive anywhere. Fruit orchards, vegetable farms, horse barns, and sheep farms are all commonplace within walking distance or a 2 minute drive from our house. We can shop at farmstands to our hearts content and see just about any domestic animal you can think of.

Today, Grace and I vistited Pilot Grove Farm which is a very short drive from our house. It's a HUGE farm that was built in 1783 and has acres and acres of rolling green pastures around it. It's gorgeous. David and I want to take some really nice photographs of it when things get green and the weather gets nice. We don't know the owners, but a friend from our ward, and fellow riding instructor at Hybid farm boards her sheep there. She shows sheep in 4H competitions and raises lambs each spring. She invited Grace to come and see her lambies today.

Grace, of course, has a blast with any animal and loves farm animals in-particular. We can't wait until the weather warms up (and Harriet is born) so we can use our membership at Drumlin Farm and go see all the animals there on a regular basis.

We've been sort of keeping track of all the wild animals that are in our yard or in our immediate neighborhood - including the river which is literally a stone's throw away. So far, we've shared our breathing space with:
ducks, Canada geese, swan, woodpeckers, cardinals, all sorts of finches and other birds, frogs of several types, a turtle, a mother fox and her babies, a beaver, a blue heron, rabbits, chipmunks, squirrels, and I'm sure I'm forgetting a few.

My favorite thing to do in the morning is open my south-facing window shades to see what is swimming on the river. The part of the river that is just across from us looks almost like a pond. It is wide and often looks very smooth and we see the swan and geese several times a week. We also see the wake of the beaver a couple of times a day. We can't see him, but we can see the wide V he makes in the water as he swims up and down the river and David and the dogs hear his big flat tail splashing the water when they go for their evening walk.

Potty Time!

It's time to party again at our house. Grace's 3rd birthday was a great party, but so was today! She actually used her potty chair today for the use it was intended for the very first time. David and I really began to wonder if it would ever happen. I bought the potty chair almost a year ago, just after we moved in and got settled. I thought 2 years old was a great time to start, but I wanted to wait until she felt secure and comfortable again after months of uncertainty and moving around. The potty chair has graced our bathroom for the past year being used mostly as a step-stool. In hind-sight, it was a good thing I bought the one that matched the bathroom and that also could be used for something else, because it has been in there much much longer than I ever planned.

Grace, for all her intelligence and physical abilities, has absolutely, completely resisted anything to do with the potty. We have tried every trick from threats to massive bribery to pretty panties to "waiting for her to be ready on her own." Nothing has made a difference to her. Every article and book I read on the subject emphasizes "DON'T FORCE THEM!!" So, I've backed off each time she's resisted. The only difference to me now, is that I'm desperate! I have a baby coming in less than 2 months and I really really don't want to buy 2 sizes of diapers and change a large child next to my tiny infant for the next year. I know that once Harriet arrives, I will be too busy and Grace will have too much adjusting to do for either of us to have what it takes to do the task. So, I made an executive decision today. With 4 diapers left and a half package of pull-ups, I resisted the temptation to buy the size 4 diapers that were conveniently on sale at the pharmacy. Instead I bought a package of newborn diapers for Harriet and came home and just put panties on my little darling.

To Grace's credit, she has come a long way in the last few weeks on her quest to become a big girl. She's been working really hard at just sitting down on the potty (something she would throw tantrums over before) and she has risen to the occasion of sleeping in her new big-girl bed and giving up her toddler crib.

David made a pretty big promise to her if she learned to use the potty. Immediatly after her victory in the bathroom today, she asked when he was going to come through on it. He really meant that he would treat her when the potty training was all done, but to her, today was a big enough day to deserve it. So, he's coming through with his treat in the hopes that she will continue her trend this week and be absolutely diaper free very soon.

If nothing else, we are learning to be less judgemental of the parenting skills of others. David and I use to cringe at people who were still changing the diapers of their 3 year-old kids and vowed to never have anything like that happen in our family. Yet, here we are with our 3-year-old. We realize we still have lots to do to finish the potty party, but we are definitely basking in Grace's golden moment of the day for now.

Yay Grace!!!! Go Gracie, go Gracie!!!!

My own personal hell

Between all the revelation and grey hairs my friends write about, it is a wonder I even bother to blog. But every once in a while, events occur which force my hand. This last Saturday was one such event.

Saturdays are precious. Indeed, Saturdays may just be sacred. More than any other day I value my Saturdays. It is the one day I have where I can do things at my own leisure, and I hate when Saturdays are wasted. This last Saturday Michelle, Grace, and I drove to Framingham to the nearest REI to buy an item. Unfortunately, we ended up getting lost. We have now lived here for almost 1 year and there is a reason we don't often head south of our place. Framingham and Natick are like the Sandy of Salt Lake City. Crazy roads that are nearly impossible to navigate and very easy to lose one's way even with the help of a GPS. We shun the communities to the south, not so much for snobbery but for sanity.

Too make a long story short, what should have been a 20-25 minute drive turned into a 90 minute drive. To add insult to injury, the item we wanted was not in stock at the store. Add in the return trip (thankfully we didn't get lost) and it turned into a 3 hour misadventure. This whole adventure started with me wanting to save $8 dollars on shipping. But I have come to the conclusion that life is too short to waste time driving in Framingham over a mere $8. From now on it is www.rei.com!

Party like it's your birthday!

Well, normally, I would just have a small simple family party for a 3 year old. However, our nearest relatives are a 10+ hour drive away and most aren't even in the next time zone, we decided to have some friends over to celebrate Grace's big day. I always feel like her birthday is a bit of an anniversary for me too. As any first-time mom can say, my life changed quite a bit on the day she was born and I feel the need to be celebratory for myself a little too. Having said that, the birthday party was all about Grace for sure...

Grace's favorite people here in Massachusetts are by far the Whatcott and McConnon families. She bonded to the Whatcotts really tightly when we house-sat and nannied for them last fall. She has also bonded (as have I) to the McConnon family as we have spent a large chunk of the last year at Rita's barn and in turn with her sons. 14 year old Coleman is a special pal of Grace's and is so cute with her. There aren't many junior high boys that would be willing to go to a party for a 3 year old girl, but he is a really great kid and genuinely likes spending time with Grace. We are so lucky to know such awesome people.

Outside of people, Grace's favorite things are trains, specifically Thomas the Tank Engine trains. So, we had a themed party for her complete with a few new engines, Thomas videos, a Thomas cake, and all the accessories. We also had everyone over for dinner before-hand and had a candle-light dinner in the dining room. Grace loves candle-light dinners. As seems to be tradition, I hand-decorated a cake for her. So far, I've done Elmo and Winnie the Pooh. Thomas proved to be a bit harder than the last two to make, but Grace seemed to think he turned out ok, so that's all that matters.

Everyone we invited is quite a bit older than she is, but she loves all of them so much and they are all so good to her. They played trains with her and brought her really nice and very thoughtful gifts. They really made her day. She said several times "oh, I'm so happy!" and "I am so lucky!" She knows she's blessed and I'm glad she doesn't take anything for granted. She is very good at saying thank you and I know she feels true gratitude for her friends and for the things she has.

She continues to be utterly spoiled by family members as well. You would have thought it was Christmas at our house with the pile of packages that we collected from the mailbox each day. We are so grateful for everyone who remembered her and who put so much thought into making sure she had a great birthday.

Happy Birthday Grace!

Today is Grace's 3rd birthday. Every parent always says this, but it's hard to believe how fast time flies. David and I seriously can't believe that it has been 3 years since she came into our lives and yet, we can't really remember what life was like without her (ok - we can remember the times when we use to set our own schedules, and go to a movie on a whim, but it seems like she's always been with us and now life without her would be unimaginable.)

Just in the last year, she has grown up so much. She celebrated her 2nd birthday just a couple of weeks before moving to Massachusetts. When we left Utah, she had a small vocabulary, couldn't say the names of very many relatives, but could put a few words together in sentences, knew most of her ABC's, liked to pretend to type on the computer keyboard, couldn't quite reach the pedals on her new trike, liked to sit on a horse and go for a pony ride, was still small enough for me to carry around for subsantial periods of time (like when I would hold her on my hip in the middle of the ring while teaching a riding lesson!) and was still fairly dependent on me to decide what to do with her day. Her world was very much centered in our family and she didn't perceive that there were lots of other people in the world who might be friends, who might be happy or sad, or who might live close or far away.

Now, she has a vocabulary that is amazing, puts together very long sentences, can spell quite a few things and recognize the shapes of many words so that appears that she can read them, can use the computer better than some adults I've known at work, can type her name out and send e-mails, can fully reach the pedals on her trike, can sit on and steer a horse all by herself, is much too big to carry far (even if I weren't pregnant), and is very much in charge of deciding what she wants to do all day including what she wants to eat, wear, play with, watch on TV, and listen to in the car. She is very affectionate when she wants to be and frequently hugs me, David, the dogs, Tinkerbell, and her friends and says "oh, I love you so much." She tells me at least 5 times a day that I am her best friend. I hope she still says that in 10 years.

Grace is now starting to understand that she lives in a big big world and knows that she lives a long way away from family. She knows that (almost) everyone in the world is someone she might want to have as a friend, and she has empathy for people who are in need. She watched a special on TV with me about Hurricane Katrina victims last week. I told her that those people didn't have houses anymore because their houses got ruined, but that other people were trying to help them find and build new houses. She has talked about it quite a bit since then that those poor people who don't have a house are so sad. I also loaded up several bags of clothes to donate to charity a few weeks ago. At first, she was upset that I was giving our stuff away, but when I told her that some people don't have lots of clothes and might only have one shirt, she immediately changed her tune. She questioningly looked at me and said "they only have one shirt?" She had never considered an idea like that before.

Our little girl is still quite a little girl, but definitely not a baby anymore (you wouldn't be able to tell it by the diapers she still wears, much to our dismay, though!!!) All we know is that we are so happy and lucky to have such a fabulous little daughter and overwhelmed at the idea that we are responsible for how her little life will turn out.

At the risk that no one will read a blog entry this long or one even longer to talk about birthday celebrations, I'm going to make 2 separate entries!